What day is it? This is the number one question in our house. Followed by, what month is it? At this point, we've lost track of time.

Normally this time of year includes back to school shopping, coordinating schedules and squeezing in a last minute family road trip. This year, none of that applies.

We've been knee deep in quarantine life for 5 months now. Five months! It feels surreal.

This past weekend was rough for me. I was anxious and emotional all day. It came out of nowhere too. I was completely blindsided by it. I woke up on Saturday feeling a bit down. A little sadness, maybe it's PMS heading my way, I thought. By 10:30 PM I was in full blown ugly cry mode.

I don't have a lucrative career. I teach. I am a substitute. I decide when I work and where I work based on my family's needs for the week. This is what I left my corporate job for, work-life balance. But I don't get to decide when I work or where I work this year. My work will be caring for my 4 kids and ensuring their success with distance education. This new part time gig I inherited is an add on to motherhood without pay and my paying job is not an actual job right now. More work, no pay. How did I get here? How did we get here?

Saturday taught me the importance of health: checking your mental health and being self- compassionate toward yourself. Without that mini melt down, I wouldn't have realized how much I - "Mom" was actually sacrificing through all this and how it was weighing heavy on my heart.

Being the primary stay at home parent is difficult. You carry much of the quarantine burden. Your workload and responsibilities likely doubled. There's also guilt. Guilt in accepting your struggles as struggles when others are struggling far more than you.

I needed to deal with these things. I needed to feel my emotions and I needed to cry.

Whatever life looks like for you, remember to health check your mental health. How are you doing? How are you coping? Allow yourself to feel and deal with those emotions. Take a deep breath or take a walk. It's ok. Be easy. You're doing your best. Look toward gratitude for peace and the grace to carry on. Most importantly, know that you're not alone!

It will be ok. We're going to be ok. This too shall pass. As does every season of life.

Xx Dee